Calm down all you zany english soccer fans

Yes, your team isn't bad.

Yes, they are capable of some good results (though be honest, two late goals against Argentina, you weren't the best side)

But there are horrible moments of inconsistency, viz one nil Northern Ireland, and you'll have a game like that. Lampard is always better for Chelsea, and similarly Gerrard for Liverpool. The munchkin wunderkind is to easy to wind up and don't even talk to me about Rio Ferdinand, even Man Utd fans know what he's about.

The group stage isn't bad, and if you win the group, probably Poland, you'll beat them, but then Argentina or in the semis Brazil?

Not gonna happen, so calm down, enjoy the tournament and don't get all "I am so shocked" when England are eliminated (or to use annoying tabloid speak "crash out")