Virgin, experian and certain death

Ten months ago I'm in this motorway service station and this honey says to me, "would you like to apply for a Virgin credit card?" As these jobs suck, and as she was kinda nice I say "Sure" and two weeks later I get one. I never used it and after a month I get a bill for £15 from 3 Telecom in Maidenhead. So I ring 'em and say "I don't have a 3 phone, nor live in Maidenhead, this is wrong" They said fine and asked me to fill in this form, and I didn't want to 'cos I was just repeating exactly what I'd just told 'em, but okay I did it.

Next month, bill says carried over from last month £15, late payment charge £10. I ring 'em again and am assured everything is fine if I just fill in a form. "I've already done so, and won't do so again, sort this out" They say sure, no problem, etc This goes on for 10 months of letters phone calls and threats and the bill is up to £200 by which time they say, "we are taking you to court" I say "Great 'cos I'm counter-suing, what's the date" this actually makes their lawyer open the file and he says "Whoops, you don't owe us anything" Hallelujah.

"One last thing, you have to tell your credit reference agency, that I have NOT been in default for 10 months, send me a copy of the letter you will send them" They said they couldn't 'cos it would be e-mail. So I told 'em to send me a copy of the e-mail and they say they can't for some unlikely technical reason.

So given that Virgin credit card in my experience behaved with all the financial skill and temerity of monkeys at a salad bar, I decide to check for myself. So I go on the Experian website for "free instant access to your file" The "free" access is gonna cost me £5.99 per month if I don't cancel the DD but okay, soo I fill in all the details, and get a message about a technical problem.

So I ring thier call centre and say "I can't access my account" bloke says "You only joined today, it takes 48 hours" "but the website says instant" says a by now bitter and twisted Stu. "Er, yes" says the hapless dolt.

So I think fuck 'em and I go the the Advertising Standards Authority website and tell 'em all about it....and wait for it......

The page won't submit.

So nearly a year of my life dealing with fuckwits, who have nothing to do with me, but can't do thier own jobs at all, and so I suffer massively unless I sort out problems NOT of my own making. So, lesson the first;

Virgin Credit Cards in my experience - hapless
Experian Credit Reference agency - misleading claims on the website
The ASA - hey it's the government, what did I really expect?

I shall never do business with any of these entities again. Make your own mind up.